by Mike Pennell
As a schoolboy, I can remember trying to talk to classroom misfits who did not listen to Dick Barton, Special Agent on a nightly basis at 6.45 pm; my Father wouldn’t have a discussion with anyone who did not read Time magazine, and in my adult life I became a social outcast when I admitted I have never watched an episode of Coronation Street.
A similar situation applies in the Volunteers’ Lounge, but with many more permutations. Obviously the first requirement is to be Cornish, and reside in Falmouth (my Truro copy of
The Packet has different news, and I only know one route to get to the car park). Spending leisure hours afloat in a yacht is quite a popular pastime, and if you don’t understand 'gybing' and 'rounding the mark' (something to do with German currency?), one sits there listening & nodding agreement with a slight smile.
There are two major factors that make or stifle 'coffee room' conversation. One is television viewing, and one’s capability to watch Sky by having a 'dish' (without one, you can’t watch 16th Century Inca Eating Habits).
The other relates to the possession of a computer. The Maritime Museum has to accept some blame for persuading us to own a PC or laptop, since many instructions and much information is sent out in that medium, and it does help those who spend time on broadband trying to identify strange super-yachts that arrive on the marina.
You don’t have to be a 'nerdy geek', but discussing ' re-booting', 'inserting hyperlinks' or 'synchronous scrolling' is child’s play if you know your way around the keyboard and, of course, have spent hundreds of pounds buying the latest model with Windows 7, Intel whatnots and gigabytes.
The Solution: Bearing in mind the Wardroom guideline that religion, politics and sex should not be discussed, and in order to facilitate conversation in 1912, each shift roster should be comprised of Volunteers who have been carefully screened by HR, because it is pointless opening a discussion on 'The stowage factor of frozen New Zealand lamb' with four people whose backgrounds vary from agriculture to motor mechanics, via deep sea diving and ancient history. A master list of Volunteers could be posted and a list of subject skills ticked in boxes, with similar background talents colour-coded so that each Volunteer can choose the correct shift to attend in order to exchange meaningful views when relaxing.
If this is deemed unworkable, I suppose we shall just have to start talking to visitors!
